Lecrae is opening up about one of the darkest chapters of his faith journey-and why the late Tim Keller ultimately became the voice that helped lead him back to God.
In the latest episode of his Deep End podcast, the Grammy-winning Christian rapper described Keller as nothing less than his "Michael Jordan," admitting he once consumed the New York pastor's sermons almost daily and even introduced rapper Kendrick Lamar to Keller's bestselling book The Reason for God.
But their story wasn't one of uninterrupted admiration.
Lecrae revealed that 2016 marked a turning point in his life. As police shootings and racial tensions gripped America, he became deeply disillusioned with many of the theologians he admired.
"I stopped listening to Keller. I stopped listening to Piper. I stopped listening to any theologian who was of European descent," he admitted, explaining that he wrestled with bitterness, disappointment, and questions about whether evangelical leaders truly understood the struggles facing Black Christians.
Looking back, Lecrae says he entered what he now calls a season of "disorientation," distancing himself not only from influential pastors but also from much of the Christian world he once embraced.
What surprised him most, however, was discovering later that Keller had quietly been addressing many of the issues he assumed the pastor had ignored.
As Lecrae slowly rebuilt his faith, he realized Keller had been speaking about justice, caring for cities, and ministering across cultural divides in ways that challenged both political conservatives and progressives.
"I was blown away," Lecrae said, describing Keller as one of the few Christian thinkers who consistently chose what he called "the kingdom way" instead of simply siding with the political left or right.
The rapper also shared several personal stories that highlighted Keller's influence far beyond the pulpit.
He recalled nervously meeting Keller for the first time-despite having met celebrities including Beyoncé, Jay-Z, Michael Jordan, and multiple U.S. presidents.
"None of them shook me the way Tim Keller shook me," Lecrae laughed.
Over time, the relationship grew into panel discussions, personal conversations, and even collaborating on a book together. Lecrae said Keller's wisdom, humility, and willingness to invest in pastors serving underserved communities left a lasting impression on him.
Perhaps the most emotional moment came as Lecrae reflected on his struggle with severe depression and anxiety.
During a retreat in Mexico, he said he was battling panic attacks and suicidal thoughts when he picked up Keller's book Prodigal Prophet, a study of Jonah that had arrived in the mail just before he left.
As he read about Jonah and cried out to God, Lecrae looked out his window and saw a whale breaching the ocean. Moments later, he noticed a decorative whale sitting beside his Bible inside the room.
For Lecrae, the unexpected scene became a deeply personal reminder of God's presence.
"That book was a catalyst for changing the course of my life," he said, calling it one of the defining moments of his spiritual recovery.
Lecrae also praised Keller's slim book The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness, revealing that he rereads it every year and requires every artist he signs to read it as well, believing its message on humility is foundational for anyone serving in ministry or music.
Despite acknowledging that Keller was not a perfect man and did not "have a monopoly on truth," Lecrae said his influence cannot be overstated.
"When I die," he reflected, "I hope people say I was a man of integrity."
As for Tim Keller?
"My experience and exposure to Dr. Tim Keller made me a better Christian," Lecrae concluded. "I can't argue that at all."
